Putting on my Big Girl Britches!

My teenie, tiny daughter laid in her incubator with all types and colors of tubes and wires coming out of her little body. A nurse came in the room and lifted the lid of the incubator. She asked me if I wanted to leave the room as she was about to do yet another painful procedure to my daughter. I simply looked at her and said, "I am fine, I wore my big girl britches today."

My daughter was born 10 weeks early and at just 2 lbs 14 ounces spent the first eight weeks of her life in the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit). She had all sorts of wires and tubes coming out of her. Some to monitor her heartbeat, some to measure her breathing, some were there to give her nutrition and still others were there to give her medicine to prevent infection. Every few days a nurse would have to come in and remove her IV and then reinsert them in newer, stronger veins. I was up at the hospital, looking and praying over my daughter when the nurse came in and was ready to change out her IV. As the nurse was telling me that I could go in the other room instead of being there to watch my daughter get poked and prodded again..my mind went back to earlier that morning.

I had awoken early that morning in order to spend some time with the Lord, before heading up to the NICU. As I read through the book of Psalms, I came across Psalms 18:1-3. "I love you O Lord, my strength." The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock in whom I take refuge; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised"! At the moment that I was not sure I could handle watching my sweet daughter cry in pain over having another IV inserted into her tiny arm, God reminded me that He was my strength, He was my refuge, He was my rock. I then was able to turn to the nurse and say, "No, I will stay with my daughter, I wore my big girl britches today". With a slight giggle from the nurse, a deep breath from me and a high pitched cry from my daughter, the nurse uninserted one IV and reinserted another IV into my brave, precious daughters arm.